Deep Green Eden
by Pika-Zukin
Summary: In the wake of last semester's affair, Shingo finds himself longing for another's company. When a new online friend fulfills his desires, will he get more than he bargained for? Sequel to Web Design, part of the EW universe.
1. ch4p73r 0n3

*cheers* This story... this story has both delighted and plagued me for months. This is its third rewrite. At least I thought about it before I posted, eh?  
It took me so long because I wanted it to be something else. But I can't write things about which I know nothing. It seems that the only thing I do know how to write is fluff, or angst topped with fluff, so that's what you get. Nyaa.  
--Neekachu

**ch4p74r 0n3**

"I think you have to move over a little, Shingo," Tracey says, trying to keep his balance. "Otherwise it won't fit."

"I'm fine," I tell him. "Just bring it in."

He takes a deep breath before he starts making strained noises. I watch, admirably, and I would help, but my hands are full. Tracey's taller and stronger than I am, so he's more suited to carry my television set into my new dorm room. I finish clearing off a space for it and move out of his way.

"There." He sets it gently on the floor near the foot of my bed. It's only a 20" set, but it's bulky and awkward to handle.

"Thanks," I say. "My parents should be up with the last couple of boxes."

"That's something, having to pack up your entire room and take it home just for Christmas break."

"I didn't have much in my old room, since I had to share it and all." I make a face as I remember my old roommate, a messy party animal with whom I didn't get along at all. This semester I have a room to myself on the top floor, only four doors down the hall from Tracey. I've brought more of my belongings with me, but it's taken help from him and my parents to get it all upstairs.

Mom and Dad return to my new room, each with a plastic crate in tow. "Quite a haul you've got," Dad says, looking around my room.

"All worth it, right?" I affirm.

"Whatever happened to your philosophy at Muramasa's school?" Mom asks with a smirk. "'All I need are my laptop and clean socks'?"

"I changed my mind, you know. I missed my comics. And a change of underwear."

Everyone laughs. "Well, we're going to hit the road while there's still a few hours of daylight," my dad says. "If we can both stay awake to drive."

"If you can't, the new SUV turns into a double bed, doesn't it?"

"Hey, we're saving on hotels already. That thing's paying for itself." Dad pulls out his wallet and hands me a couple of bills. "You two get some pizzas. This room needs more boxes."

"Thanks," Tracey and I say at the same time. I just now realize I'm starving.

Mom hugs me as Dad says, "Now, Tracey, keep an eye on him. A whole room to himself, it's hard to tell what he'll do."

"Um..." Tracey isn't sure how to respond. I make a show of folding my money in half and sticking it in my pocket. They have no idea what Tracey and I have done in his own single room.

"Good luck in classes, you two," Mom says as they leave. "And keep warm. I didn't know it snowed like this here. It seems unusual."

"I'm surprised, too," I admit. "Must have been a freak storm. I'm sure it'll warm up soon." I wave as they head down the hall. Tracey also waves, and I can tell he's a little jealous of the way my parents and I get along so well.

I look around at my life packed in boxes. "I don't feel like cleaning this up."

"It's enough that it's in here, right?"

"That's right. No asshole roommate to touch it all." I clench my fists like a triumphant anime character. Finally, my freedom at hand, freedom to use my laptop, Cacao, in peace, freedom to... well, do anything. "Besides, we did enough moving up and down the stairs."

"Up and down the elevator."

"Same thing." I pick up my phone and dial my favorite pizza place, whose number I've memorized. About an hour later, we take our pizzas from the lobby to Tracey's room, which is spotless, as usual.

"So how was your Christmas?" he asks.

"Eh. Fairly boring." I don't want to tell him I spent the majority of it sulking over the fact that he and I couldn't be together any more. "How was yours?" I know I'll regret asking that.

"It was nice. Noelle came here just as break started, and we stayed at Professor Oak's after that." There's a wistful tone in his voice. "But she's meeting some friends in Johto now," he adds, as though he knows I'm wondering where his girlfriend is now.

I shouldn't feel jealous. Once again I curse the emotions I had to develop over the past couple of months. I think I like it better when I was content to be completely alone behind my laptop's screen.

"So did you get any good presents?" He changes the subject. I wonder if he's honestly asking, or if he recognizes my brooding.

"You bet." I force a smile. "Of course, I'm still waiting for a car. You know, to motivate me into getting my license."

He snickers. "Oh!" I exclaim. "I almost forgot!" I'm on my feet like my legs are springs, wiping my hands on the back of my jeans as I run to my room. I come back after a minute, holding a plastic CD case. "Here you go. Happy late Christmas."

He takes it from me, opening it. On the rewritable CD, I've written in permanent marker, "Nature Boy Mix." He laughs and gets up to put it in his stereo. A few seconds into the first song, he doubles over. "The _Gekigengar_ theme!"

"The best present was a CD burner," I tell him. "So I made you a collection of anime songs."

"Wow. Thanks. Now I have to think of a present for you. Sorry I didn't before Christmas."

"You already gave me enough."

There's a silence, and I wish I hadn't said that. "Um... well, you're welcome," Tracey says. I admire him for making light of the whole situation. "Hey. You're not allowed to look depressed when the _Gekigengar_ song's playing."

A chuckle escapes my lips and my downcast head. "I'm trying. But I..." How do I say it? _I think I'm in love with you?_ It was bad enough he and Noelle had to work on putting it behind them. He didn't need any more interference from me.

"Shingo." Tracey stops the CD. "Don't be upset... whatever it is..."

"I hate it!" I blurt out. "What's wrong with me?" I feel shaky. And Tracey, the eternal nice guy, hugs me for lack of words. "It's not fair," I say as I rest my head on his shoulder. "You're perfect, and I can't have you."

"I'm not perfect," he says.

"You are."

He holds me out at arm's length, staring into my eyes. "Listen. Everything will be okay, right? I'm not leaving you totally alone, you know."

"Maybe you should."

"I know better than that. Besides, then where would I be? Waiting around all alone for Noelle to finish her pokémon business and come back? Who will watch anime with me then?"

"You have Faye for that." It's not like I'm his only friend at PokéTech, in the world.

"Yeah, but she didn't get me started on it. And she's not the same." He gives me a shake. "Hey. The point is, you're not alone."

I nod. "You're right. I'll get over it sometime." I take a big breath. "Thanks."

Tracey smiles. I know, deep down, it's better to have a friend for life than a lover for a little while. But I still wish I had someone, specifically him, with whom to share my desire. My own imagination compares poorly.

But it has to do, I decide later, as I return to my room for the night. My thoughts don't have a girlfriend or morals to uphold. I'll unpack my luggage for a bit. I'd rather not think about anything.

I stack some DVDs on the shelf above my wall-mounted desk, where my laptop sits, folded down. It dawns on me then. When I first got her, I started visiting chat rooms. At Muramasa's school, late at night in my bedroom, I discovered sexuality while in my regular online hangout, a new friend for the night talking me through the scenario. I feel a stirring at my midsection. Depraved and hopelessly pathetic as it sounds, I actually miss those days. And I haven't been in that chat room since last summer, right before I started at PokéTech. I miss my non-cybering friends. We used to talk about anime and comics and pokémon training. I want their company, I decide as I boot up Cacao and pull out my chair, unpacking forgotten. Old friends will make me forget these stupid emotions.

***DigitalBlade enters #pokemecha**  
**Arca9:** blade?  
**Arca9:** is that really blade?  
**DigitalBlade:** Yo 9 ^_^  
**JigglyPuffly:** BLAAAAAAAAAADE!  
***JigglyPuffly glomps da Blade**  
**DigitalBlade:** Whoa. Hiya Puffly. I missed you too.  
**Samuraichu:** Hey, look who's back.  
**DigitalBlade:** Everyone throw a party for me.  
**JigglyPuffly:** Whatcha been up to?  
**DigitalBlade:** Transferred schools. I'm at PokéTech now.  
**Arca9:** hey cool. I was thinking of going there  
**DigitalBlade:** There are some great programs here. Hopefully I'll be inspired to become a Scizor master again.

It's like I'd never left. Tracey may be my closest friend now, but the three regulars of #pokemecha, now the only ones talking in the room, were the best I'd had a couple of years ago.

**Samuraichu:** What, you stopped?  
**DigitalBlade:** I got distracted.  
**JigglyPuffly:** Oooooooooooo  
**Arca9:** heh heh heh  
**DigitalBlade:** Forget I said that.  
**Arca9:** we want filthy details  
**DigitalBlade:** No.  
**JigglyPuffly:** Pleeease?  
**DigitalBlade:** Some welcome back this is. :p  
**Arca9:** wait... this was rl?  
**DigitalBlade:** I said forget it!  
***DigitalBlade climbs in his mobile suit.**  
**Arca9:** oh yeah??  
***JigglyPuffly races to her closet full of pilots**  
**DigitalBlade:** The bishounen closet! I'd almost forgotten! ^_^  
**JigglyPuffly:** ^.^v  
***DeepGreenEden enters #pokemecha**  
**Samuraichu:** Closet full of yaoi.  
**JigglyPuffly:** Ooooh!  
**DeepGreenEden:** Ooo? Yaoi?  
**Arca9:** 3D3N  
**DeepGreenEden:** 4RC4  
**Arca9:** w0rd  
**DeepGreenEden:** ph34r  
**DeepGreenEden:** ^_^  
**DeepGreenEden:** Now where's the yaoi?  
**JigglyPuffly:** Itsa party in my closet.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Wow, I had no idea it was this kind of room.  
**DigitalBlade:** I guess I did miss out on a lot since I've been gone.  
**Arca9:** you shouldve stayed. we dedicated the yaoi to you.  
***DigitalBlade blushes and is honored.**  
***JigglyPuffly hands Blade a pilot.**  
**DigitalBlade:** Oh.. my...  
**JigglyPuffly:** Everyone take a bishie!  
**Samuraichu:** Puffly, what have I told you about that word?  
**JigglyPuffly:** puffpuffpuff o_-  
**DeepGreenEden:** Arca9, if you had told me this kind of thing went on, I would've been here sooner.  
**Arca9:** eden likes bishies  
**DeepGreenEden:** *^^*  
**JigglyPuffly:** Who doesn't?

My friends and this newcomer are still the only ones active. I remember that it was always like this, and the users who seem silent are most likely holding one-on-one conversations in private windows. There's something about reliving this memory that makes a warmth grow in my chest. It's like coming home, in a weird sort of way. I do owe a lot to #pokemecha.

Then a private window tab appears, the name highlighted in red. It's Arca9's friend, DeepGreenEden.

**DeepGreenEden:** Nice pilot you've got there.  
**DigitalBlade:** Aw, he's nothing. Just some eye candy.

What has made this Eden message me? Perhaps he's bored, and trying to get to know everyone in the room, since he just arrived.

**DeepGreenEden:** I'm on to you. You and Jiggly, you cute lil fangirls dominate mecha anime fandom these days. ^_~  
**DigitalBlade:** Teehee I wuv bishies. *snerk*  
**DeepGreenEden:** You said bishie! Evil!  
**DeepGreenEden:** Aww, but you're cute.  
***DeepGreenEden ruffles your hair.**  
**DigitalBlade:** Gah! Okay, that's enough. ^^;  
***DeepGreenEden chases you around and backs you into a wall, thoroughly messing up your hair.**  
**DigitalBlade:** Nooo, my prettyboy image!  
**DeepGreenEden:** Oh, you're not a lil fangirl?  
**DigitalBlade:** Nope. Sorry to disappoint.  
**DeepGreenEden:** So you're a yaoi-loving bishie?

I laugh out loud. I'd never heard a more fitting description of myself. Eden is very easy to talk to; my responses come naturally.

**DigitalBlade:** YOU SAID BISHIE!!  
***DigitalBlade changes nick to DigitalBishie**  
**DeepGreenEden:** heeeee!  
***DeepGreenEden changes nick to DeepGreenYaoi**  
***DigitalBishie falls off his chair laughing.**  
**DeepGreenYaoi:** You're not in a chair. You're still backed against the wall.  
**DigitalBishie:** Am I now?

It seems that Eden's reason for messaging me is clear. That he sought me out at random, and that we're hitting it off so well thrills me, turns me on more than my imagination could. I have forgotten my troubles for the moment, something much better occupying my time.

---

I yawn wide, hoping the coffee I'm carrying to class from breakfast will perk me up. It's cold outside. PokéTech is only a few miles north of the actual city of Vermilion, but not so far from the sea that it should have such a cold winter. There's snow covering the ground still, and the air is sharp. This isn't the type of weather for me. I'd just gotten up an hour ago, but as late as I stayed up last night, I might as well have not gone to bed at all.

"You know, the idea is to rest for your first day of classes," Tracey teases me. He and Faye ate breakfast with me, and we're walking to our classes together.

"Not all of us are model students, you know."

"You're such a rebel."

"I bet I could fix this," Faye says. She's holding the paper with her schedule. "It's not fair that I have to take morning classes."

"What makes you so special?" I ask.

"I work at night. So I need my sleep all morning."

"I wouldn't call what you do on your computer work," Tracey remarks.

"That's between my computer and me, thank you very much." She sticks her tongue out at him and giggles.

I shake my head and take a sip of coffee. Faye is Tracey's other best friend at PokéTech. She's perfectly sweet to him, but she takes great delight in teasing me. I had been obsessively annoyed with her when her attitude interfered with last November's situation, but since then, I got used to her. Right before winter break I started playing her game, firing back teasing insults in my defense. This seemed to amuse her greatly, and our mock fights always make Tracey laugh, so it continues.

I've been looking forward to one particular class all day: an intensive pokémon training session. Tracey and Faye both are in it with me, and, amusingly enough, we each have three pokéballs apiece.

"Very nice," the instructor, Mr. Tajiri, remarks to Faye of her Wartortle. She beams with pride. Her Jigglypuff jumps up and down at her feet, and her Ditto turns into a flawless Jigglypuff. "And a lovely pair of Jigglypuffs you have," Mr. Tajiri adds.

The whole class erupts in laughter while Mr. Tajiri smacks his forehead and moves on. Faye crosses her arms over her generous chest and gives Ditto a dirty look as it promptly returns a pink blob. For some reason I think of my chat room friend JigglyPuffly, and that only reminds me of Eden. I sigh wistfully.

Next Mr. Tajiri compliments Tracey on his old Scyther, particularly healthy-looking Venomoth, and affectionate Marill. Marill bounds over to Faye's Jigglypuff afterwards. "That's so cute!" Tracey exclaims. The backpack is unzipped and the sketchbook is out, lightning-fast.

"Oh... he's attentive," Mr. Tajiri says to me.

"Former pokémon watcher," I tell him.

"What have we here..." He stands before my lineup. "A Ledian... and is that a Porygon 2? Good lord, where did you find one?"

"Well, I don't like to brag," I say.

"Yeah, right," Faye follows up. "Hey, Shingo, how come Blade's not out?"

"Who's that now?" Mr. Tajiri asks. I don't even get to tell him my involvement with the Porygon 2 project. But I hold up Blade's pokéball. "Just thought I'd save the best for last," I say. "No offense, guys," I add to Ledian and Porygon 2. I press the button and release Blade.

"Oh! A Scizor! Very impressive, Mr. Primavera."

Tracey's Scyther is staring at Scizor intriguingly. "Such a strong build, and sharp claws... looks like you've trained it well," Mr. Tajiri says. "This should make for a very interesting class."

I don't remember the last time I stood up so straight, felt the warmth of praise. This is what I missed at Muramasa's school, before everyone decided I was too good for them.

"Look at him, he eats it up," Faye says. Tracey looks up at me from his sketchbook.

"Jealous," I retort with the same proud grin plastered on my face.

"Yes, but can Blade compare to my Jigglypuffs?" She sticks her chest out deliberately, and Tracey snickers.

The week goes by surprisingly fast. Before I know it, it's Friday; the days have flown by for me thanks to one kind of entertainment from Tracey and Faye and another kind from Eden. And now that the weekend has started, I'm looking forward to sleeping in after my late nights online. Tracey and I walk back to Cascade Hall, our dorm, early in the afternoon. The pokémon training session is Mondays and Wednesdays only, so Fridays end early for us. "You are disturbingly happy lately," he says. "Care to fill me in?"

"Oh, it's reached disturbing levels now, has it?" I smirk at him. "I guess you could say I have an online boyfriend. As close to one as I'm going to get."

"Ah, that explains the late nights, then." He laughs at my offended look. "But I'm glad you're happy about it."

"I feel so much better. This hasn't happened in a long time," I say. "Naturally, I'm going to enjoy it."

"Just how do you maintain a relationship over the internet, anyway?"

I clap a hand on his shoulder. "Oh, my poor nature boy. It's all in the art of conversation. It's just conversation that happens in cyberspace, that's all. Quite possibly the safest kind of relationship there is, in physical terms. If you know what I mean."

He looks a little embarrassed, and like he has some arguments to present. He wisely keeps them to himself. I always love his tactfulness. "Anyway, I hope you can tear yourself away for a little bit to watch anime with us," he says. "Faye's coming over to my room after dinner."

"Oh yeah... we did plan a marathon, didn't we?"

"Fridge full of Mountain Dewgong."

"I'll have to get online for a second and tell him about it. I guess I forgot last night."

"Had your hands full, huh?"

I nod before that sinks in, and I smack Tracey verily.

Eden isn't in #pokemecha, and I lose track of time waiting for him and talking to the others. I don't realize my door has been open all this time when I hear knuckles rapping on the wood and Faye saying, "Hey, anime waits for no geeks. Come on, we're waiting for you."

The clock on my windowsill reads 6:45. "Oh... um, give me a little bit."

"Oh, chat room, huh? That takes me back."

"Hey!" I minimize the window hurriedly. For some reason I want to keep this all for myself.

"Wow, a secret chat room at that! Got a cyber date or something?"

"That's none of your business!"

"Aww, you're blushing!" She's grating my nerves again. Maybe I'll never get used to her.

"I said I'll be over in a second! You don't have to stand there!"

"All right, cuteboy, I can take a hint." She leaves then. I get up to close the door, but she tackles me. She's been waiting just outside. "Ha! Thought you got rid of me, huh?"

"Faye!" I cry, exasperated. She must have already broken into Tracey's stash of Mountain Dewgong, for she giggles insanely and tickles my sides, reducing me to a squirming victim against the wall in the hallway. I break away and she dashes into my room.

"What are you doing?" I rush back in to see that she'd restored #pokemecha. Just like that, my last shred of privacy is exposed. "Are you happy now?" I ask bitterly.

She stops giggling at least, staring at the screen with an unreadable expression. "Don't make such a big deal about it," she says, stepping aside and tossing back her brown hair. "I used to be all over chat rooms when I was thirteen. It's how I learned to communicate with the outside world."

My cheeks are hot. "Just let me tell them I'm leaving. Then I'll be right over."

"Okay." She whisks by me and is out the door. She hasn't looked at me once. "Women," I mutter as I sit down again. I apologize to my friends for the interruption and ask Arca9 to relay my message to Eden. Then I log off and walk to Tracey's room down the hall.

He hands me a Mountain Dewgong. "I picked this one out just for you," he says, showing me the DVD cover. It's called _Lu-Gi-Oh_. "I think its second title is 'King of Cheese.'"

I snort. "You know me too well," I say, taking a seat on the floor and leaning against his bed. Faye is in a chair with her feet propped on the desk, looking deep in thought.

Tracey sits on the floor between us both, turning on the DVD player. "Besides, I think the art style is cool. The lines are so sharp."

_Lu-Gi-Oh_ is plenty cheesy, as everyone involved seems to worship a card game, and the little battles they hold last forever. But Tracey's right about the animation, and with the way we were making fun of it, I'm hooked after two episodes. Faye keeps commenting that Lugi in his dark form is hot, but I'm drawn to the suave villain Maximillian Rapidash. I wonder if he compares at all to Eden, and I remind myself to ask him if he likes anime, too. If we have one more thing in common, then he will have stolen my heart. 


	2. ch4p73r 7w0

Thanks for reviews, everyone! The fluffiness must be expunged from my system before I can work on Eternal Winter 3. ^^;  
Just like our three friends, I only make fun of Yu-Gi-Oh out of love. It's a bleeding anime soap opera. You know it's cheesy and repetitive, but you just have to watch. It's a staple of Shingo and his friends' lives now, at least for the time being, something they can look back on. "Remember when we used to watch _Lu-Gi-Oh_ at school?" "Yeah, those were the days."  
By the way, I'm sore at Cartoon Network for removing Yu-Gi-Oh. Though I did see it's supposed to be on Saturdays in March... probably first season again. I hate CN. >_ The "unladen Natu" joke is Jebal's. He's so dorkycute. Very much like a certain purple-haired computer boy... >_> --Neekachu

**ch4p73r 7w0**

**-->/msg DeepGreenEden:** Hey there.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Hiya bishie.  
**DigitalBlade:** I missed you last night.  
**DeepGreenEden:** *^^* Where were you?  
**DigitalBlade:** Watching anime with friends.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Cool.

He's quiet. Quiet in the main room, too. Suddenly I'm nervous. I've managed to secure a Saturday night alone, just for him. Doesn't he want to spend his with me in turn?

**DigitalBlade:** Wait.. where was I? Didn't Arca9 give you my message?  
**DeepGreenEden:** I wasn't here last night, either. So it's just as well you weren't.  
**DigitalBlade:** Oh.. where were you, then?  
**DeepGreenEden:** I went to sleep early. Busy week, you know. ^_~  
**DigitalBlade:** *^.^*  
**DigitalBlade:** So.. are you busy now? Or just tired of me? ^^  
**DeepGreenEden:** No, not you. I'm working on something.  
**DigitalBlade:** Working, eh? No time to work on me? ^.^  
**DeepGreenEden:** You never tire. *nuzzle*  
**DigitalBlade:** That's me, unstoppable Blade.  
**DigitalBlade:** Am I too much?  
**DeepGreenEden:** Eh?  
**DigitalBlade:** I mean.. if you want me to leave you alone, I will. We had our fun, I guess.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Oh! No way. I like to think the possibilities for virtual fun are endless.  
**DigitalBlade:** Do you... have real fun as well? *^^*  
**DeepGreenEden:** Trying to imagine, are we?  
**DigitalBlade:** I like to know just what I should be picturing when I think of you.  
**DeepGreenEden:** ... oh my. You're a very serious bishie, aren't you?  
***DigitalBlade can't help but laugh when the word bishie is involved.**  
**DigitalBlade:** You didn't answer my question.  
**DeepGreenEden:** What's that now?  
**DigitalBlade:** What's the air speed velocity of an unladen Natu?  
***DeepGreenEden falls on the floor.**  
**DeepGreenEden:** You're adorable.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Yes, unbridled, lock-the-door-wake-the-neighbors fun. Usually after we log off as well. Hence the exhaustion.  
**DigitalBlade:** **^^**  
**DeepGreenEden:** Imagine the noise if we met in real life, eh?  
**DigitalBlade:** Can we?  
**DeepGreenEden:** What, meet for real?  
**DigitalBlade:** Yeah!  
**DeepGreenEden:** I don't think so, dear.  
**DigitalBlade:** We could be having our real fun...

I am drowning in the desire of meeting him for real. I also have to start typing with one hand.

**DeepGreenEden:** This is real enough for me. *bites your ear*  
**DigitalBlade:** But I want you here... you could be my laptop.  
***DeepGreenEden dances in your lap.**

That does it for me. After a couple of minutes of silence, I resume our conversation.

**DigitalBlade:** So what's got you so busy this evening?  
**DeepGreenEden:** I'm a corporate spy.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Just kidding. Homework. ^_^  
**DigitalBlade:** On Saturday night?  
**DeepGreenEden:** Hey, you're a university student who gets his kicks from a computer on Saturday night. Don't you look at me.  
**DigitalBlade:** But.. that's like bringing homework to a date!  
**DeepGreenEden:** Well, you should motivate me to finish it. Then reward me. ^_~  
**DigitalBlade:** Mmmmrowr. ^.^  
***DigitalBlade ties himself up.**  
**DeepGreenEden:** Wow! That's talent!  
**DigitalBlade:** You know it. I'm so cool.  
**DeepGreenEden:** "So cool." What are you, 12?  
**DigitalBlade:** You boy-hungry pedophile! I'm 17.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Uh huh.  
**DigitalBlade:** I'll show you 12! *presses his 12 inches against you*  
***DeepGreenEden is distracted.**  
**DeepGreenEden:** Damn you. ^.^

---

I slept well into the afternoon on Sunday, a habit for which Tracey reprimands me in full. Early Sunday evening I have to work at the library. Shelving books in the quiet atmosphere gives me all the more time to fantasize.

I realize he has a point about getting some regular sleep. I retire early Sunday night. I have to keep up my health in this cold weather.

Monday we have dinner at the dining hall in Earth Complex, the best that campus food can get. Tracey and I claim a table, but Faye hasn't finished picking up her food yet.

"Something's bothering her," Tracey says.

I make a noncommital sound and concentrate instead on my stir-fry, which will warm me up enough until it's time to go back outside.

Faye joins us a few seconds later, sitting down next to Tracey and across from me. She opens her bottle of water and picks up a napkin from the pile of them in the center, then says pointedly, "what?"

I glance at Tracey. "You're staring at me," she continues. "What is it?"

"I'm not staring," I say.

"I know that!" she snaps.

It must be a female problem, I decide, and take a big bite of warm rice and szechuan beef, which is never unpleasant and annoying.

"Faye," Tracey says gently. "Are you--"

"Sorry," she whispers.

Tracey raises a dark green eyebrow at me expectantly. I blink at him. Am I supposed to do something now?

"So, uh, I wonder what that wacky Maximillian Rapidash is going to do with those duelists in his clutches." I change the subject. "Maybe we'd better watch some more." If the prospect of more Lugi in his tight black leather doesn't cheer her up, I don't know what will.

"Yeah, maybe," she says. "I don't know what I'm doing tonight, though." She eats her dinner in kind of a hurry and rises, giving us a halfhearted farewell.

"You can't say I didn't try," I defend myself.

"Shingo..." Tracey gives me a familiar I-know-you're-not-that-dense look. "I think she's a little rattled by your online boyfriend."

"What? Why would she be?" I remember Friday night when she'd peered into #pokemecha and stopped laughing suddenly. Tracey's shoulders fall and he stares at me.

I have other things to worry about by the time night comes. Eden hasn't shown up online. I read through one of our log files, which fuels my imagination enough, but I'd rather have a fresh conversation with him. It's been a week since we met, and, in my experience, a week is pretty impressive for a chat room-based relationship. I don't even know his email address, so #pokemecha is the only way I can communicate with him.

Tuesday's classes are pretty uneventful -- a history of the Pokémon League, the second installment of last semester's programming course, and another biology. I'll be grateful when these required credits are done with and I can concentrate on more computer classes. As I head back to my dorm, I'm wondering if they schedule those in the afternoons when I glance up and see a familiar head of thick brown hair a few feet in front of me.

Jealous of my online boyfriend, is she? Tracey's mentioned before that Faye likes me, and that's why she teases me all the time. I can never say the feeling is mutual. I was certain she'd give up on me after the fiasco with Tracey, but if she's upset over Eden...

"Faye!" I find myself calling out to her before I realize it. I hold Cacao's carrying case to my side as I jog to catch up with her.

"Hey there," she greets me. Her voice is still subdued. I feel unnecessarily guilty, and ask about the paper she's holding.

"I decided to rearrange my schedule like a proper student, and not break into my record and delete my morning class like a delinquent." She smiles in spite of herself. "So now I don't have any of my classes before noon. And only two of them got changed -- the ancient civilizations study that was in the morning, and my programming II class. I have that at one in the afternoon on Tuesdays and Thursdays."

"Hey, that's my class," I say.

"Aw, no. Not another one with you." She grins, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes.

"Don't think I'm excited about it. Now I'll have to compete with you for the best grade."

"But you like to compete. Remember our video game battles?"

I scowl. "I am _so_ going to beat you."

"You keep thinking that." She's smiling more.

"I'll show you. I'll..." I pause, thinking of today's date. "That's it! _Dark Millenium_ just came out. I'll challenge you to that."

"What just came out now?"

"New _Lu-Gi-Oh_ game. We can battle just like we're in the show."

"Oh, sure. Why watch the cheese when you can live it?"

"Maybe there are codes for strip duels."

Faye bites her bottom lip and looks around, like she's picturing it. "I hate you," she says.

I snicker at that. "So let's go into town and pick up a copy."

"What, right now?"

"You don't have class now, do you? Then there's no reason not to."

We ride a shuttle bus that takes us to the mall in Vermilion City. Our first stop is the electronics store, where a copy of _Dark Millenium_ for the PikaStation is in my hands instantly. Faye reads the back of it as we leave. "Oh, you can go on a solitary quest, too. Free your friends from the clutches of Maximillian Rapidash."

"Can I play one of the friends in his clutches?" I ask suggestively.

"No, I wanna be one of the prisoners who's saved by Yami Lugi."

"It's not just a game, it's a dating sim."

"Dating sim, nothing! It's one of those deals where you aim little spaceships to fire off their clothes."

"Are we an expert at those, Faye?"

She sticks her tongue out at me. "Don't blame me because I get bored on the weekends." She hands my game back and looks behind her. "Oh yeah. I forgot that Tracey didn't come with us."

"I hope he's not looking all over campus for us." It hasn't occurred to me until now that we took off so suddenly. I was eager to get a copy of the game.

"Yeah." Faye pulls at the ends of a lock of hair that falls over her shoulder. I realize that now that I have my game, I'm at the mall with her alone. Tracey will have quite a time when he finds this out.

"So, um. Shingo." She pokes my shoulder with one finger. "I'm sorry that... um, yesterday. Sorry I yelled at you."

"You yelled at me?"

"At dinner, you know? It's stress. I need to relax, huh? Play more video games."

"Mmm, dinner." I place a hand on my stomach.

"You're hopeless." She pokes my arm again.

"No, I'm hungry. Let's go to the food court." She looks a little startled for some reason. I poke her shoulder in return. "Hey. Don't be sorry."

"Hmm?" She looks at me for a moment until she realizes I'm talking about yesterday. She smiles gratefully.

It hits me then, she's just like I was over Christmas break. She wants someone who's claimed by another. For possibly the first time in my life, I feel a powerful empathy, that I know both how she feels and how helpless Tracey must have felt. It's not my fault I'm involved with Eden.

Our dinner is boxed combos from the sushi place. In fact, I have two. Faye tells me she hates me, that I always seem to eat so much but I still stay thin. I say that I hate her, she has an impressive pair of Jigglypuffs to show off. Next thing I know, I'm getting poked mercilessly with disposable chopsticks.

"I'll never live that down," she laments as we wait for PokéTech's shuttle bus.

"Everybody's gotta be known for something. What's the class going to remember me for? My famous Blade?"

Faye snorts and bursts out laughing, clamping her purple-gloved hands over her mouth. I slump dramatically, sighing, and swing the bag with _Dark Millenium_ inside. "You know what's going to happen, don't you?"

"What's that?" The bus stops and we climb in, taking the first seat.

"One of us is going to have to write a big _Lu-Gi-Oh_ self-insertion fanfiction. That way we can both be slaves, only I'll stay with Rapidash and you get 'saved' by Yami Lugi."

She shakes her head with disbelief. "You'll never get me into fanfiction again."

"Oh? Again? Why not?"

"It's a long story. And not worth telling."

I tilt my head. "Fandom gone bad? I guess I know how that is... awhile ago I tried getting in with some _Gekigengar_ boards and stuff, but they were all a mess. Too many people, too much random stuff."

"Too many psychopaths," Faye mutters.

"Well, yeah, probably. But you can't tell me you wouldn't like a _Lu-Gi-Oh_ fic just for you."

"Why would you write a fanfiction for me?"

"I didn't say I was going to do it! I'm not creative." _But I suppose I can write erotic scenes with all the practice I've had,_ I think.

"I think I'd be just ahead to play the game," she decides. "Um. If... um."

"I _guess_ you can use my PikaStation." I feign exasperation.

"Well, not if it'll kill you." She reaches deftly into my unzipped coat and tickles my side with one hand. I squeal a little too loudly with surprise, which makes her laugh more.

She follows me to my room, eager to start her own game. Tracey's door is halfway open with the lights on, so I knock and step inside. He's in his usual spot, on the bed with a sketchbook on his raised knees and the TV on for background noise. "Hey, you two," he says. "I was looking for you for dinner."

I hold up my bag. "_Dark Millenium_. Had to pick it up. Come see, Faye's going to start."

Tracey and I watch Faye start her own solitary quest. After awhile the need to multitask arises, and I log into #pokemecha. Eden isn't there. "Again?" I say under my breath. I see Tracey looking in my direction, noting the screen and what's on it. Curiosity gets the better of me, and I ask Arca9 if he knows where Eden's been the past two nights. He does not. I bid my friends there good night and log off.

"So we ever going to watch more of the anime, or are you two going to be sucked in by the game?" teases Tracey, who I don't think has ever played a video game in his life.

"I'm sure we could leave her alone and go watch it ourselves," I tell him.

"Do you want to leave me alone with my Yami Lugi?" Faye asks suggestively. I smack my forehead as Tracey snickers.

"Actually, I could do with anime," I say. I suddenly want to leave my room, get away from my computer where Eden isn't. Faye saves her game and we go down the hall to Tracey's, our anime headquarters on account of his being the cleanest of our rooms. A couple of hours of silly commentary along with the show lifts my spirits, but Mr. Model Student soon announces he needs to go to bed.

"It's not even midnight," Faye protests.

"Unlike _some_ of us, I have class in the morning," Tracey says. "Sorry, but I'm used to going to bed early after years of pokémon watching and working with Professor Oak."

"Boy, arrange to have class at noon and everyone hates you." Faye giggles as she and I leave the room. Tracey stands in his doorway to wish us a final goodnight. Faye waves and rushes to my room to play more _Dark Millenium_.

I fold my arms across my chest and glare at Tracey. "You're doing this on purpose."

"What?" he drawls, putting on a deliberately innocent expression. "You know I go to bed earlier than you." He stares back at me, fighting a smile. I can see it pulling at his lips. "Besides, I didn't tell you to go to mall together," he spits out.

"Hmph." I make a low sound from my throat. Tracey chuckles at my defiance. "Good night, Shingo."

"Sleep well, nature boy." I return to my room, where Faye is sitting on the edge of my bed, reading the _Dark Millenium_ booklet. "You're not playing," I say.

"Yeah, I think I am kinda tired. Might as well go to bed soon and sleep til eleven tomorrow, eh?"

"Rub it in, why don't you?"

She sticks her tongue out. "Hey, Shingo?" she asks. "Can you, um... can you walk me back? It's dark and cold and stuff."

I don't know how to respond to that one. Except to counterattack. "What happens when I have to walk back from your dorm all alone, then?"

She blushes. It's the first time she doesn't have a comeback ready with perfect timing. If she's not going to say anything, what's she thinking? Is she wondering why I don't refuse, so I can get online? For that matter, why aren't I online? Eden might be there by now, since it is late at night. But I picture Tracey standing in front of me again, giving me that look of his.

I pick up my coat from the back of my spare chair. "Oh... you don't have to," Faye says apologetically.

"That wouldn't be very nice of me now, would it?" I hand her coat to her, and she pauses before putting it on and hastily following me into the hall, down the stairs, without a word.

Outside, I take a deep breath, marvelling at how the air feels so cold and clean in my lungs. Faye is staring up at the stars, shining diamonds on a velvet blanket. They are a sight, but not something to look at while walking. She stumbles on a crack in the sidewalk. "Hey, careful!" I exclaim, catching her arm and helping her balance. "Are you all right?"

In the faint electric light from a lamp above us, I see her eyes shining, wavering. "I'm okay," she says. "Sorry about that." She's clinging to the sleeves of my coat.

_Oh God, it's just like a movie,_ I think. "Cheesy," I say, without knowing why. "'Don't trip, Faye! I'll catch you!'"

I'm glad that she gets the joke and starts giggling. "'You saved me!'" she gasps. "'Oh, thank you!'" She hugs me, overcome by her role, which I assume is also a sneaky way of showing affection. She seems plenty embarrassed about it, and we continue to Thunder Hall like it never happened. I've forgotten my gloves in the room, and I clench my hands into balls for warmth inside my pockets.

Once we're at her dorm, I step into the lobby to get feeling back in my feet before I head back (why, I'm not sure, because I'd just lose the feeling again, but I have warmth for a little bit to replenish myself, I suppose). Faye pulls off her purple magic-stretch gloves and stuffs them into my pockets. "Here," she says, unzipping her coat.

"Is that my reward?"

"Yeah." We're standing there awkwardly. I don't feel like walking in the cold again.

Faye steps up to me without saying a word, unzips my coat most casually, and reaches in, fingering my sides. I try to resist, but it ends with a high-pitched noise and my squirming away. "And what's that for?" I demand.

"Because I can." She smiles guiltily.

I strike back for revenge. She raises an eyebrow while I knead my fingertips away along her sides. "I'm not ticklish," she says.

"Anyone ever try before?" I counter, moving upward. Maybe closer to under her arms.

"No, I can't say so. But I know I'm not. You can, um... you can keep trying, though."

My hands have brushed against rounded, protruding flesh. I jerk them back and shove them into my pockets, fully embarrassed. I look away, and I hear her chuckle softly, which fades within seconds.

"I'm an idiot, aren't I?" she asks quietly.

"What? What makes you say that?"

"I don't know why I'm trying. It's not going to work, and you're awfully nice about it."

"Huh?" She's scaring me. I have never heard her sound so darkly serious.

"This is why emotions are worthless. And why I'm stupid for falling into them." She squeezes her own arms. "You slept with Tracey. You like Maximillian Rapidash. You have an online boyfriend. You don't like girls."

I'm stunned, both at the accusation and that it's Faye saying it, pouring her heart out. "I never stopped liking girls," I tell her. "I just started to like guys, too. You know. Gotta do all the wacky experimentation while I'm away at school."

"So I doubt I'm worth waiting for until you graduate."

"What?" I reach a hand out. I want to console her, somehow.

"See what I've turned into?" she cries. The attendants at the lobby desk are watching us now. "Forget you know me, please! I don't want you to remember me this way!" She flees for the elevator.

"Faye!" I call, chasing after her. She pushes the elevator button just as I catch up. The car is at the top floor, and it's slowly coming down.

"What are either of us supposed to do?" she asks painfully. "Just leave me alone and go on with your life. I'll forget about it eventually, and then maybe I'll learn!"

"Forgetting about any problem won't make it go away. It'll just get worse."

"Don't you think I know that?" She hangs her head, sniffling. It's Tracey and me on our first night back from Christmas break all over again. I take an example from him and draw Faye into my arms, a reassuring hug. I briefly wonder if Eden's online, and what should I tell him when I get back? _Why are you thinking about that?_ I ask myself.

The elevator dings and the doors slide open. Faye sniffs and pulls away from me. "There's so much you don't understand," she says.

"I could if you tell me."

She doesn't respond. The doors slide shut, but she remains still. "Faye?" I ask.

"Not tonight."

I nod. "If you want to tell me anything, you can."

"Thank you for today," she says. "For sushi and _Dark Millenium_ and hanging out with me all evening and walking me back. I hope I didn't ruin it."

"Of course not."

"I guess I should've come back here alone, and left you to be online."

"No, you shouldn't have." She needs more consolation. That has to be why I do it. I lean forward and kiss her forehead. It's kind of cushioned by her bangs, but I've done it anyway. She stares at me questioningly. "Get some sleep, okay?" I say. "I'll see you at the pokémon session tomorrow afternoon."

"Really?"

"Yes. Now sleep." I push the elevator button for her. Still on the first floor, the doors open, and so we must part.

"Good night, Shingo," she says from inside, waving.

"Night." I wave until the doors close and I hear the elevator ding for each floor it passes. I smile at the desk attendants, who must have been amused by our little drama. I zip up my coat as I step outside, sticking my hands deep in my pockets. I feel Faye's gloves there. "Oh yeah," I say to myself, putting them on. I flex my fingers inside the purple material. They fit perfectly over my hands; but then, they are the magic-stretch variety. I hope her hands won't be too cold tomorrow before I can return these to her.

There's a part of my mind that says, _You know, you're only committed to someone_ online. _That doesn't mean you can't spend the night with Faye._

Shut up, brain, I tell it silently. I couldn't betray Eden like that.

Nor, I think, could I deceive Faye like that, either. She deserves better. 


	3. ch4p73r 7hr33

If this sounds like the end of the story, it's not.  
Tajiri-sensei is starting to become a full-fledged character. @_@  
Thanks for the reviews so far! *dances*  
--Neekachu

**ch4p73r 7hr33**

I set my tray down with a clatter and pull out the chair. For lack of anything to say (and, admittedly, of total consciousness, for it is 8:30 in the morning), I blink at Tracey and yawn wide.

"Only two cups of coffee?" he teases, noticing my drinks on the tray.

"Just for this sitting. I swear I'm scheduling classes for the afternoon next semester. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Thinking about being online, that's what."

"No, not last night, either." I did check #pokemecha when I got back to my room last night, but to no avail. I left a message for Arca9 to pass onto Eden and went straight to bed, thinking about _Dark Millenium_, if Eden likes _Lu-Gi-Oh_, and Faye. It took awhile to get to sleep. I sigh and cut a bite-sized corner out of my thick waffle.

It's too quiet. Mornings are never really the best times for conversations, but it's getting to me. "Do I take it all too seriously?" I ask of Tracey.

He gives me a questioning look as he swallows a bite of cereal. "What's 'it all'?"

"Everything. Eden. I haven't seen him online in two days. It's not like him to disappear without a trace."

"These things happen?" he hazards a guess. "Computer failure? Busy with school or real life?"

I nod slowly. "Yeah. I'm sure that's it." I sip my steaming coffee. "No, that's not it. My question. Everything. Freaking life. Look at me. This... guy I talk to online hasn't been on in two days and I'm throwing little fits like... like he cheated on me or something."

Tracey doesn't seem to think I'm making much sense. "If you're throwing fits, you're doing a fine job of hiding them."

"My point is, am I interpreting the whole thing in the wrong way?"

"If you have to ask, then you probably are."

Only first thing in the morning can one get away with being so blunt. I stare down at my plate for a minute. "But... but... you don't know what it's like. Online relationships. I know something's there. To an outsider, it's stupid, and it might be fake, but I know differently. Don't you believe me?"

Tracey looks regretful he said anything. "I believe you. I guess I shouldn't be giving advice on something so intricate."

"I didn't mean that... I..." I gesture weirdly, trying to find words. My hands fall on the table with a dull thud. "I liked it better when I was alone. Nothing to make myself sick about. See what I've turned into?" I surprise myself with that much. It's what Faye said to me last night.

"It'll be okay," Tracey ventures. "Something will get resolved one way or another, right?"

"It's all your fault, you know." I raise my nose at him. "I was perfectly happy in my own world until I met you." He grins, amused. "Yeah," I continue. "You laugh it off, nature boy. But you have to live with what you've done to me."

Tracey laughs harder. I realize the double meaning in what I said and snicker uncontrollably. That was a disaster for a little while, but it turned out fine. I will conquer my chaotic emotions, and someday, I will look back and laugh.

It's a pleasure to end my day of classes with Mr. Tajiri's training session. Everyone is knelt down by their pokémon, making sure they're in good shape. As usual, Tracey's Marill is wandering all over the place, including weaving between Blade's legs.

"Shingo, look!" Tracey exclaims. "Look what Marill's... aw, you missed it."

I turn to him. "Faye's not here yet."

"She didn't change this class too, did she?"

"No, I don't think so." It was practically the last thing I'd said to her last night, _"I'll see you at the pokémon session tomorrow afternoon."_ If she's still too upset to come, I'll feel responsible.

Mr. Tajiri is in the middle of explaining the rigors of a solitary pokémon journey to win gym badges on your own when Faye bursts in. "I'm so sorry," she says, gasping for breath. "My last class ran over. Please forgive me, master." She clasps her hands together and bows her head below them.

"I expect you know by now that my class is the most important, Miss Jigglypuff." Mr. Tajiri, it seems, has a sense of humor like mine and Tracey's. I'm laughing under my breath at his purposefully serious glare.

Faye is also suppressing giggles, her hands still pressed together. "I only gave myself an asthma attack to get here on time, great master."

"I wouldn't expect anything less. Very well, you may enter this hall of future pokémon masters."

The whole class is giggling now, and Faye takes a grateful spot next to Tracey and me, pulling pokéballs out of her backpack. "It's always a riot in here."

"Oh, it will be a riot," says Mr. Tajiri, making a fist. "A most riotous... riot... indeed. Yes. One-on-one battles all around, so that I might evaluate each of your strengths and weaknesses. Starting on Monday."

My ears perk up at that. At Muramasa's school, I was somewhat of an expert at evaluting trainers.

"And no, Mr. Primavera," Tajiri says. "No trainer file databases. I remember you showing it to me after the first class."

"Aw," I pout. Faye pokes my arm. "Suck-up," she whispers.

"Jigglypuffs."

"Ohh..." she drawls. "You're going down."

"You'd like that."

"Whoa," Tracey interjects. "Save that for after class, you two."

"Yes, after class." Tajiri has caught on to us. "That's a different kind of battle altogether."

Pokémon master aside, he's also a master of the final word. I glance away with burning cheeks and see Faye shielding her eyes as if hiding from the class, her face red as well.

After class, Tracey and I are well ready for dinner, but Faye says she isn't hungry. "I'll get something later," she tells us as she leaves in the opposite direction.

"I forgot!" I say to Tracey as we move along. "I still have her gloves."

"You do, huh?"

I ignore his implication. "I left mine in my room when I walked her back last night, so she leant me hers." I show him a purple glove from my pocket. "What?" He gives me one of his raised eyebrows.

"No, no, you don't want my opinion."

"Whaaaaat?" I persist.

He rolls his eyes. "You take off for the mall yesterday, you walk her to her dorm, you have her gloves, and... _and_ you're watching the door like a Fearow when she's late for class."

"Huh? No I wasn't."

"Your problem isn't about Eden. It's about Faye."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Shingo." Tracey sighs. "You are many things, but intuitive isn't one of them. You don't realize things until someone comes right out and explains them for you."

"I do not!"

"You're channeling everything you should be feeling for Faye towards this Eden guy. Now you haven't talked to him in a few days, and the attention's going where it should be."

"You're insane. She told you to say this, didn't she? Just like her."

"She's innocent. I'm just a sharp-eyed watcher."

"You're a meddlesome... you... yeah, you!" I exhale soundly. "I'm just concerned about her because I sympathize. Last night she was kind of upset. Um. About me, actually."

Tracey's eyes widen. "But she seemed okay during class. Like normal. But she ran off right after... oh no."

She doesn't want to be around us any more? I know she said she wants to forget about it, but... Tracey is right. She seemed like her old self during class, along with her standby, a well-adjusted façade to hide the fact that she's exploding inside. Is that how it's always been? And here she'd dropped the shield when she vented to me last night...

I bid farewell to Tracey after dinner. I'm going to Thunder Hall. He hasn't said any more on the issue, but I'm starting to wonder if he's right.

At the front desk of her dorm I flip through the student directory, looking for her room number and wondering if any of the attendants are the ones from last night, if they recognize me. I smile at them as I leave for the elevator. I wait for it standing in the same place I was the night before.

Faye's room, 302, is at the end of the hall right near the elevator. All the doors have construction-paper signs in the shape of either pokéballs or Thunder Badges bearing the residents' names. Faye's is the only door of the surrounding ones with just one pokéball sign, for she's managed to get herself a single room. I knock on the closed door. All is silent.

I knock again. She's not ignoring me from inside, is she? I want to just open it and find out, but I won't intrude. So I keep knocking, and there's no answer. She's either ignoring me or she's not there.

By now I feel pretty stupid. I should've just called her room while I was looking it up in the directory. Or asked her a long time ago if she has an instant messenger screen name, so I could've saved myself the trouble of walking halfway across campus in the first place. What am I doing here? I could be playing _Dark Millenium_. Or waiting for my idiot online boyfriend to get himself online. Why am I at Faye's door? I know she's all right. She came to class, didn't she? She probably feels so much better that she's hanging out somewhere else, trying to get over me just like she said, and she's--

"Shingo?" I hear her ask a few feet to my right. She was down the hall. In fact, down the hall where the bathroom is. She's holding a fuzzy red towel in place, her other hand dangling a plastic basket of toiletries. Her wet hair clings to her bare shoulders.

I try to apologize, but the words are trapped in my throat. I spin around in a neat half-circle and stare at the ceiling. "Bad timing."

She pokes my back, between my shoulder blades, and opens her door. "Give me a minute, and you can try again," she says. When I hear it close, I relax and lean against the wall. Her towel... it only barely came past her hips. My cheeks are suddenly very warm. It was probably the most erotic thing I've seen in my life. In real life. Moreso than anything Tracey did, because of what I didn't see, what was hidden.

_I am such a hentai,_ I chide myself. I take deep breaths and think about anything else. The coming pokémon battles in Tajiri's class comes to mind. It'll be great to command Blade again. Pokémon battles steeled my nerves in the past. See, I come to PokéTech, I lose that hardened warrior's spirit.

_Heh... hardened warrior,_ I think. Such a rotten hentai.

Faye opens her door. "Okay, you're safe now," she says, amused. I breathe deeply again and enter her room. She's fully clothed and running a comb through her hair. Though she may have well kept the towel, for her shirt clings and leaves little to the imagination. But most of her shirts are like that. Not that I've noticed.

"I'm really sorry there," I say. "I didn't think that I should've called first until I got up here."

"Well, you found me." She sets her comb down, bends at the waist, and flips her hair over her head, tousling it. Then she snaps back upright, shaking her head left and right, hair flying. It's fluffy and soft-looking when she stops, and she gives me a refreshed look.

"Um. So I wanted to see if you're okay. Since last night," I say awkwardly. "And I brought you something." From my coat pockets I pull out a chocolate muffin, wrapped in napkins, and a bottle of Jolteon Cola. "Since you didn't come to dinner with us. Not that you should have a muffin for dinner. But there weren't many left, so I had to get one for you."

She takes them both and blinks at me. "You... if I'm okay?" she asks incredulously, staring at the muffin in her hand.

I scratch the back of my head. "I didn't get a chance to ask in class. Or after. Oh, but... if you were avoiding me, I guess I ruined that." I laughed, hoping to sound like I was kidding.

"No, I'm not avoiding you." She tears off a piece of muffin. "My class beforehand ran over, and I wasn't hungry for dinner when you guys were. And I didn't have time for a shower when I got up. So I'm about to get a start on homework. Project for tomorrow's programming class, remember?"

My stomach sinks. "Oh, no. I forgot about that."

"Then what are you standing around here for?" She grins. "Get back to your room and program away!"

"I should've brought my laptop here with me." My laziness and reluctance to start homework is kicking in.

"Don't think you can copy off me."

"No, not that. Motivation, really. If I'm alone in my room, I'll get distracted, and I'll never get it done. You can poke me now and then to keep me on track, see? That's why I usually do my homework with Tracey."

"When you put it that way, it sounds so wrong."

"Hey!"

She's plenty okay, it seems, giggling and taking a drink of Jolteon Cola. "Or maybe it sounds so right. A good kind of distraction."

"Okay, you can stop now."

"Motivation, huh? Okay, if you get it done in less than two hours, I'll parade around in a towel."

I bury my face in my hands. "There's no end to it," I mumble, feeling warm again.

She laughs. "I'm sorry. But that was wide open."

"I can't win," I say into my hands. "My homework will go unfinished, and I'll flunk out, and you'll have no one to torture."

"Oh, I can't have that! You'd better go get your laptop."

"Yeah, I guess so." I sigh.

"Um... I meant get her and bring her here. You're right, two programmers are better than one."

She acknowledged my laptop as a _her_. I feel honored. "More walking," I tease.

"You are the laziest cuteboy I know."

"I'm distinguished."

"Go on, then." She pushes me backwards gently.

"So you're really okay?"

"Yes, I'm okay. Still sorry you had to see that, but I feel a little better." Just like that, the shield lowered. She must trust me.

"Don't be sorry, Faye. Just feel better."

Her eyes are locked with mine for a moment. Within that brief time I study them, so wide and green and intelligent and beautiful. She smiles. "Go now. Come back sooner."

I nod and walk sideways to the elevator until she closes her door again. I don't know what just happened, but I feel glad that I'm going to be working on programming homework. But I should be, if I'm going to major in it. Some thirty minutes later, I return to Faye's room with Cacao in tow.

I didn't notice the first time I was in it, but Faye's room is cluttered and disorganized, making me feel like a neat freak almost in Tracey's ranks. Her computer is spread out over one wall-mounted desk (and to the dresser beside it, as well as the floor). The other desk is host to piles of paper, empty soda cans, and dirty plasticware. There are books and CD cases scattered around the floor. Upon further inspection, there are also bits of pokémon feed around the floor as well.

"Sorry about the mess," she apologizes. "I guess you can sit wherever you can find a place."

The best place seems to be her unmade bed. I pull the covers up. "Nice computer, by the way. I'm impressed."

"Really, you mean it?" She claps her hands and grins like she's built it herself. "I just upgraded it over Christmas break. I did most of it myself over the years."

I blink. I was right. "Wow," I whisper. She has a fortress with her custom computer. I feel altogether de-geeked with one little laptop. Cacao's only exterior component was her new CD burner, which I'd unplugged and left in my room for now. "That's a nice Christmas present, an upgrade," I say. "Do your parents know a lot about computers?"

"I doubt it," she mumbles. Her tone reminds me of Tracey's when I first asked him about his family, so I drop the subject.

Without anything to distract me, I finish my project in less than two hours. Faye bends back in her chair, arms stretched behind her. "I got something done early for once. I don't think anything could feel better." Her stomach growls loudly. "Except finally getting some dinner. Ow."

Soon we have pizzas. I can always eat a second dinner, especially after accomplishing homework. She flips through the channels until we come across a science fiction movie, which we pick apart and add comments to, much like with _Lu-Gi-Oh_. The movie ends at eleven. I wonder if I should head back to my room while Faye searches the channels again. "Is the programming class your first tomorrow?" she asks.

"Yeah. Nothing like starting your alternate days at one o'clock."

"You know it." She nods.

"So I shouldn't be tired already, since I don't have to get up until noon." I half-lay down on the bed, my legs still over the side in a sitting position but my head now resting in my folded arms. It's more comfortable than it should be.

"See how much damage morning classes have on your sleep schedule?" Faye leaves the TV on the cartoon channel and turns her attention to her computer. I close my eyes and hear mouse clickings. I really do feel sleepy. Must be all the pizza I ate, or my makeshift forearm pillow. Lying down for real sounds very nice right now. I kick my shoes off and stretch my legs behind me and underneath the covers, yawning. I throw my keys on the floor, since it's not good to lay on them. And the wallet from my back pocket, it makes me feel unbalanced. Now I'm perfect.

"What's with you?" I hear Faye ask.

"I'm comfortable now." Whether that was coherent through the crook in my elbow, I'm not sure. I open one eye to see her smile and turn back to whatever she's doing online. I start nodding off. Must stay awake. Must walk back. But I'm so warm and full... and I can't fight my eyes.

"Hey." I come to at Faye's soft voice and gentle shake. I have no idea how much time has passed.

"Uh? Sleep." It's all I can manage to say. She pushes on my shoulder, so I move, rolling over from my stomach to my side. I'm half asleep, and did the lights get turned off now? Darkness is sleep time.

---

In my dream I hear faint music. I'm drifting away from foggy inner visions, but the music continues. In fact, it's above me. I feel much better when it stops. Must have been a neighbor. I rub my eyes. It's light out, so I wonder how close my alarm is to going off, and if I have time for more sleep. When I remove my hands I see Faye, who is lowering herself back into the covers from having turned off her alarm radio on the shelf above our heads.

"Hi," she greets me.

My eyes are wide open now. "Umm..." I try to say. Memories of pizza and rocket ships on strings come to me. And emptying my pants and lying down, never to get up for the rest of the night.

"Did you sleep well?" Faye asks.

"I guess I did. Since I don't remember much."

"You don't, eh?" She smiles maliciously. "Let me... fill you in." Her voice is low. She weaves strands of my hair through her fingers. "You could say I exhausted you to the point of passing out last night. And likewise. I don't think you know your own power."

"Wow. Now I wish I could remember."

"I'm kidding." She tickles my side until I squeeze my arm against the spot. "You fell dead asleep sometime after the movie. I didn't have the heart to pull you out of bed and send you to your room, so I moved you over instead."

"Oh... I remember that." I sit up. "Uh, thanks, I guess. I didn't mean to invite myself for the night."

"No, thank you. You're so nice to sleep next to." She rests her head on my chest, an arm around my waist. I notice she's wearing pajamas, a grey PokéTech t-shirt from what I can see of the top half. I wonder when she changed as I stroke her hair.

"I'm sorry I didn't notice what it was like to sleep next to you," I say. This is overwhelming, amazing, sharing an innocent morning with Faye. And she seems so happy. It all makes me... I think I'm happy as well.

She lifts her head to match my gaze. "You're welcome to find out again."

"Can I?" Every night since Christmas break, I've wondered what it's like to hold someone close, and here I am. And Faye, of all people. Is this really the girl I couldn't stand two months ago?

It's only natural that we are kissing next. Her lips are soft and full, and, having only Tracey's with which to compare, sweeter than his. Her gesture is fueled by emotion rather than lust, I realize. Is this the difference between the two? Between love and physical desire? Had I ever really wanted Tracey back now that I have Faye?

She parts from me to look into my eyes again. "I wish we could stay like this," she says.

"Can't we?" I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, my hand continuing down her neck.

"It's after eleven thirty. I set my alarm earlier than usual so you could go back to your room before class."

I'd forgotten about class. That doesn't seem important now, even if the homework we'd done is what brought us together. I sigh regretfully. "Cruel fate."

"I know." She kisses me again and gets out of bed, stretching. At least she's sensible. I do need to shower before class. I pick up my discarded keys and wallet, yawning and feeling that my teeth sorely need brushed. "Remind me next time to just pack a bag," I say.

"Just like a sleepover." Faye giggles.

"I could get used to these sleepovers." Now I realize that she has been close to me and kissed me with my crusty teeth and probably rank breath. "I promise I'll brush my teeth beforehand," I add, feeling disgusting.

"Good thing those weren't open-mouth kisses, huh?"

I hang my head in shame. "I've ruined our morning. And it was so beautiful."

"Aww." She hugs me. "No, you haven't. It's still the best morning of my life."

"Mine too." I squeeze her, marvelling at how well she fits, and how her chest feels pressed against mine. I wonder if she can feel just how much I'm enjoying it, the way I seem to be squeezed against her as well. I don't know whether it's embarrassing or inviting. I'm still horribly awkward about intimacy.

I have no idea if Faye's had any experience with the opposite sex at all, either. She presses closer and lightly bites my neck, which makes me shiver. "I'll meet you in your lobby at twelve thirty, okay?" she suggests.

I nod. "Tease."

"Bigger tease."

I wish there's another freak blizzard. I could do very well with cancelled classes. But I put on my coat. "Oh, here." I hand Faye her gloves. "Here's the real reason I showed up yesterday. Really."

She laughs. "I should loan you more stuff, if it lures you overnight."

I hurry back to Cascade Hall and jump in the shower. The hot water, my soap, my toweled-off hair as I face myself in the mirror afterwards -- everything is different and foreign, most significantly the lightness in my chest.

Tracey is already in the middle of his classes, else I'd surprise him with my story. I try not to fly down the stairs when it's twelve-thirty. I feel the disk with today's project in the front pocket of my laptop case and turn the corner from the stairwell, where I see Faye waiting for me.

"Feel better?" she asks.

"Yes. Clean teeth and everything." What a dork I am.

But I don't think she minds, as she gives me a kiss and slides her tongue artfully past my lips. "Mmm, minty," she approves.

"Glad I passed the taste test."

She giggles and interlocks her fingers with mine as we head outside. Yes, everything is new and absolutely right, I decide. Even the crusted-over snow and salt-stained sidewalks are beautiful in their own way. If this feeling, sharing it with Faye, is the reason Eden was meant to stand me up, then I accept it. Forget him, if the nights we spent bonding online mean that little. 


	4. ch4p73r f0ur

Shingo/Faye fluffiness has become my latest pasttime. Tracey and Noelle are starting to get jealous, they don't have any nighttime cuteness on my computer.  
Do I dare post NC17-disguised-as-R fic? Sometimes I think I should.  
_Noelle:_ I have flimsy lingerie for nothing...  
_Tracey:_ It's not for nothing, dear. ^.^  
_Shingo:_ _I_ know of a good situation she could write about... starring the four of us...  
_Faye:_ You cute little PERVERT.  
_Noelle:_ I can't believe you said that! Tracey, do something!  
_Tracey:_ .... Wow... four...  
--Neekachu

**ch4p73r f0ur**

It's cruel, my ambiguous work schedule. The supervisor rotates the shifts of my co-workers and me, which, I admit, frees us from the monotony of having set hours. But, at the same time, it can interfere with one's perfect new life. Few students will come to the library on Friday evening, but we are bidden to work anyway. Fortunately, it will close earlier than the normal weekday, and I will be free to join Faye and Tracey for anime, free to join Faye afterwards.

A classmate I recognize approaches the counter. I get up from where I'm sitting with my laptop so I can check out her books. "Hey, you missed a few notes in class today," she tells me. "Did you decide to sleep in?"

"Yeah." I smile. "You could say that."

When she leaves I return to my memories. Yesterday Faye and I went to our computer class together, where we didn't pay a whole lot of attention after handing in our program disks. Then we didn't see each other until it was time for dinner, during which Tracey caught on to our cuteness, and looked both relieved and pleased for the both of us. And after that, Faye and I played many hours of _Dark Millenium_ together in my room until our attention turned away from the game...

Someone else came to the counter with books to check out. I regretfully put my flashback on hold to do my job for one minute.

...Until she set down her controller and moved to my lap instead, and I lost any interest in playing Lugi's opponent, Seel Kaiba. How was it that she was the one to take almost every lead? At the time I only assumed I was in the hands of an experienced Faye, but when she suddenly shuddered and clung to me...

"Hey, Shingo, I'm going to make my rounds shelf reading," my co-worker for the evening says. I snap out of my memory and nod, unzipping Cacao's carrying case and booting her up on the desk in front of me.

_"Are you okay?" I asked when I was lying still beside her._

"I'm fine." She was still breathing heavily. "I just... I've never..."

"Don't tell me I'm your first?" I finished for her. "I can't be, not for someone like you."

"There hasn't been anyone else I'd rather have." She hugged me tight, her head nestled against my bare chest. She seemed fascinated with nuzzling the narrow trail of lavender wisps down my chest. "I mean it. I was settled on being alone all my life... the thought of sharing myself with someone was... was so vulgar."

"Faye... if I'd known..."

"But then I met you. My physical side beat out my personal. I tried to brush it off as a shallow attraction, but the more I got to know you, the more I really wanted... everything... you're the only person I've ever loved."

Oh, my Faye, who gave herself to me so willingly... whatever I saw in the male sex -- the open-mindedness of the concept or the entire gender personified in Tracey's body -- she had surpassed it all. It had been, in conventional terms, my first time as well. Nothing could make my heart swell as much as the knowledge that Faye and I had shared something intensely profound, and that she has changed my mind about so many things. There is true power in this love business.

And with my mind so blissfully clear and my face perpetually graced with a smile, I log into #pokemecha, because, for the first time in weeks, I want to go there specifically to see Arca9 and Jigglypuffly and my friends, not my so-called cyber boyfriend.

***DigitalBlade enters #pokemecha**  
**Arca9:** I'll still see you on instant messenger right?  
**DeepGreenEden:** Yeah, sometimes. Just not very often.

All smiles and clarity vanish from me. Not only is Eden online for the first time in God knows how long, but he seems to be saying his farewells to the room, but not me. I feel like I've been spying on a conversation I was never meant to hear.

**DigitalBlade:** Well. Hello.  
**JigglyPuffly:** Hi Blade! *tackle* Been awhile. ^.^  
**DigitalBlade:** Yes, yes it has, dear Puff.  
**Arca9:** yo blade  
**DigitalBlade:** Greetings, Mr. 9.  
**Arca9:** word  
**-->/msg DeepGreenEden:** Good afternoon.

There's a long pause in our private window.

**DeepGreenEden:** Hi.  
**DigitalBlade:** I haven't seen you in awhile.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Yeah, there's been stuff going on in RL, and it looks like I won't be online for awhile.  
**DigitalBlade:** Nice of you to inform Arca9 and the rest of the room. I was worried about you at the beginning of the week.  
**DigitalBlade:** I missed you, you know.  
**DeepGreenEden:** I'm sorry. Like I said, real life happens.  
**DigitalBlade:** Didn't you miss me?

He doesn't answer.

**DigitalBlade:** Well, at least I know you're not going to be online at all, as opposed to ignoring me for some unknown reason.  
**DeepGreenEden:** I wasn't ignoring you.  
**DigitalBlade:** I suppose I could tell you something.  
**DigitalBlade:** Since you already know so much about me, where I probably don't know nearly enough about you.  
**DigitalBlade:** I have a girlfriend now.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Oh... congratulations.  
**DigitalBlade:** I admit it was unexpected, but things just sort of happened, and here we are.  
**DeepGreenEden:** I understand that's how these things occur.  
**DigitalBlade:** Look here.  
**DigitalBlade:** You should be having a different reaction.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Should I?  
**DigitalBlade:** I don't know if you realize it, but all the time we spent really meant something to me. Because it wasn't just cybersex dialogue, it was conversations about real stuff before and afterwards. You can fake stuff like that once or twice, but not for a week. I know, and I can tell you were serious.  
**DigitalBlade:** Then you disappeared without warning. And you don't seem that eager to talk to me now. Care to explain?  
**DeepGreenEden:** You have a girlfriend out of nowhere and you're drilling me for questions?  
**DigitalBlade:** What's that now?  
**DeepGreenEden:** If you care so much about me, why are you seeing this girl?

I have to think about that one. Is this some kind of mind game?

**DigitalBlade:** It just randomly happened. She's been a friend for a couple of months, and she's always liked me, and lately I've been spending time with her alone, and I found out I like her back.  
**DeepGreenEden:** So I don't matter anymore.  
**DigitalBlade:** No, *I* don't seem to matter to *you* anymore.  
**DeepGreenEden:** You're sure touchy about your relationships. What if your RL girlfriend had to go home for a few days, and it was an emergency, and there was no way she could tell you? Would you go find someone else in her absense?  
**DigitalBlade:** What are you talking about? You're the one who seems to be giving off the air of "it's just some text online."  
**DeepGreenEden:** Am I? You seem to be overanalyzing things.  
**DigitalBlade:** There, you're doing it again. You're not telling me anything from your perspective. What do you think? And more specifically, why do you care so much about my girlfriend?  
**DeepGreenEden:** You're right.  
**DeepGreenEden:** Okay, here's what I think:  
**DeepGreenEden:** I'm glad we had our time together, and that you took so much away from it. It was enjoyable for me, too.  
**DeepGreenEden:** I'm also glad you have a RL girlfriend who can give you more than words on a screen.  
**DeepGreenEden:** But I hope you're not just rebounding on her, or taking advantage of her months-long feelings for you just because you haven't had anyone to cyber with lately.  
**DigitalBlade:** It's not like that!  
**DeepGreenEden:** I hope not. I do like you, and I don't want to see you screw up a real relationship.  
**DeepGreenEden:** But I have to be going now. Farewell, Mr. Blade. Thank you for everything.  
**DigitalBlade:** Thank you, too.  
***DeepGreenEden kisses you.**  
***DeepGreenEden has left #pokemecha**

I scroll through the window, rereading everything before I close it. It was certainly a strange conversation.

But I don't care, because I have Faye.

Well, it hurts for a few moments. I think Eden has been playing with my trust. I will have to be more careful with it.

For the rest of my time at the library, I discuss _Lu-Gi-Oh_ with JigglyPuffly, who enjoys the cute male cast, and with Arca9, who plays the card game with his classmates. I think about inviting Faye to come to the chat room and introducing Tracey to the program and getting him set up with a screen name so we can all babble about the show and game and maybe start an online RPG or something. I entertain this prospect as my co-worker and I shut down the library for the night and go our separate ways. Faye and Tracey should be waiting for me in his room.

"Hey," I greet Tracey from his open door. He's reading the back of a DVD case. "Ready for anime?"

"Sure. Where's Faye?"

"She's not here?"

"I thought she'd be coming from the library with you."

That's weird. "Well, hand me your phone," I tell Tracey. I call Faye's room. "Hi there," I say when she answers. "Are you coming over?"

"Oh... is it time? Yeah. Sorry, I got sidetracked. I'll be there in a few minutes." I hear her kiss the phone right before she hangs up.

Tracey exhales and gives me a mischievous smile. I stare back at him, trying to hold my amusement in check.

"I never thought I'd see it happen," he says.

"I'll bet."

"I mean, I would have been happy if you just stopped hating her."

"I never _hated_ her... when I first met her, I thought she was interfering too much. And had an attitude problem. Now I know her better."

"Know her a lot, eh? Did you... get to know her?"

I burst out laughing at his forced innuendo. "Do you talk to Noelle that way?"

"Oh, I don't have to talk." He joins me in laughing it up.

"Wait, wait..." I catch my breath. "Can I commission you to do some sketches?"

"Oooh! Do I get to watch?" He falls onto his back in bed.

I grab the back of a chair while doubling over. "You are... the professional... watcher," I remind him between breaths.

He sits up again and turns on the TV. I take a seat on the floor, trying to compose myself before Faye arrives. Unfortunately, as soon as she comes in, I lose it, as I'm picturing the two of us being watched by Tracey and his ready sketchbook.

"What?" she asks expectantly, smiling.

"You wouldn't mind being the subject of an art piece, would you?" I take her hand as she sits beside me.

"Like nude modeling? Why, Shingo, I didn't know you could draw."

"There you go, Tracey. You said you wanted to take an art class."

"Hey, I think my sketchbooks have plenty of nudity already," he says.

"Aha!" I point directly at him. "I _knew_ they weren't _all_ filled with pokémon notes."

"Of course not. Most of those are back at Pallet. I've got new ones now."

"You two." Faye shakes her head and giggles.

It's too bad I can't stay completely focused on anime tonight. Eden's parting words haunt me a little. How could he accuse me of using Faye? I do care about her, and now that I think about it, I have for some time. Like earlier this week, when I wanted to cheer her up by inviting her to the mall with me. That certainly proves I'm not a sex-crazed maniac.

So I have a real girlfriend now, one who's smart and geeky and beautiful. One who can't really compare to the distant Eden. Still, I think his name will always ring poetic in my memories. What a thing to choose for a screen name, which indicates that some part of him is very deep. Indeed. Was he trying to prove all along that within his soul lay a hidden paradise? Alas, not for me. But how special I must be to have visited his private garden, even briefly.

Some hours later I kiss Faye goodnight and lie beside her, thinking about how warm I am until I fall asleep. When I awaken next, it's early Saturday afternoon. I sit up carefully, since Faye's still asleep, wondering if I have any homework to take care of, and if she and I should go to the mall or something fun.

She stirs, and I hear a sleepy "hi" as she runs her fingernails lightly along the small of my bare back. I relish the shivers as I lean down on an elbow to face her. "Hi yourself," I say, and kiss her for a long time. I can see that she's starting to mean everything to me.

We each take showers, she on the girls' floor below mine. She'd thought ahead and brought a change of clothes with her. As far as I'm concerned, she can move into my room with me. I think about that during my whole shower, and put the idea to her as we walk to the Earth Complex dining hall.

"Really? Just stay with you all the time?" she asks. "That would be cool."

"I know! We'd already be living together. How about that?" I squeeze her hand.

"Oh, Shingo, you're so sudden."

"It's my spontaneity that won you over, isn't it?"

Our late breakfast (or early lunch, I suppose it could be called) is rather quiet. "Are you tired?" I ask, since Faye seems a little burnt out.

"Kinda. It took awhile to get to sleep last night."

I chuckle. "Did I rock your world that much?"

I'm glad she giggles at that. "Well, you are something to think about." She pauses, staring at her plate. "Shingo? You are happy to be with me, right?"

"Of course I am." I hadn't expected a question like that.

"You don't just feel sorry for me, because you found out I like you?"

"That's not why I'm with you." Are these kinds of conversations normal? I have to ask Tracey. "Believe me, Faye, I'm really happy, and it's all thanks to you."

She gives me a smile, maybe a little doubtful. Poor Faye. She really is as clueless about relationships as I am, apparantly. It'll be nice to learn together.

Our walk back from the dining hall is quiet as well. Faye draws in her breath, exhaling a pensive sigh. I am just about to ask what's wrong when she says, "I really did have a good reason for asking you that."

"Asking me what? If I'm glad to be with you? It's okay."

"No... I..." She stares at the sidewalk below. "I've been dealing with this since last weekend. I've tried to ignore it, but it seems I can't, especially when it keeps me awake at night." She stops walking and releases my hand. "Forgive me, Shingo. Please."

I'm thoroughly worried, as well as confused. "Whatever happened, you can tell me," I say. "Anything."

She draws in another ragged breath and clenches her eyelides shut. "I'm DeepGreenEden."

I can only stand silently. Faye's back is to me, and I see her hands holding her elbows, fingers gripping the material of her coat. "Arca9... I've known him for a long time, through an old fandom. He suggested I come to one of his chat room hangouts, because... because my New Year's resolution was to get over you."

I feel my eyes blinking. It stings a little. "I went along with it," she says, "and took a chance in messaging this DigitalBlade person. He seemed to think I was a guy, or he wanted me to be one, anyway. I went along with it, because, hey, it was only online. I told Arca9 to follow along, too... I guess I was that amused by the concept. I was perfectly content to live with it, too, until about a week after it had all started -- that's when I noticed #pokemecha on your laptop, and saw that DigitalBlade was you."

That Friday... when she was prying me away from the room for our first night of _Lu-Gi-Oh_... that was why she'd suddenly halted before my screen...

"The night after that, I thought about telling you, but I couldn't," she continues. "I wanted it to be some kind of miracle -- you'd find out that your beloved Eden was me and you'd declare me the perfect one for you. But I imagined how'd you react more realistically... especially at how much you seemed to enjoy cybering with a guy. So after that night, I couldn't log on again. My New Year's resolution was ruined. I finally had you, but it was in the one way I didn't want to."

I open my mouth, but only faint sounds emerge. I am truly struck dumb.

"That's not the worst of it," Faye goes on. "In my darkest fantasies, you'd be so distraught over Eden's sudden disappearance that you'd come to me and learn to love me. I even tried to fix it that way... asking you to walk me to my dorm at night, inviting you to work on programming with me... but I didn't expect it to actually work. And I don't know why, but I had to try one more test. I guessed -- and I was right -- that you'd return to #pokemecha yesterday while you were at work. So I waited around there. I wanted to see what you'd tell Eden about your new girlfriend... if you'd say something like 'you suck for standing me up, and I have a wonderful girl now, so goodbye.' But all you did was beg Eden to tell you how he felt about you."

My brain is still trying to process this insane story. "So if I was a convenience for you, I understand," Faye says. "I manipulated your feelings through an online lie, rather than try to earn your love in person. I know now... you really did like your image of male Eden better."

Something goes _snap._ I feel it, almost hear it ringing between my ears. "That's not what happened at all!" I shout.

Faye turns around for the first time. I see tears in her eyes. "How could..." I start to say. "All this time... how could you not tell me!?"

That isn't what I want to say. But it slipped out, so maybe, subconsciously, it is what I want. She can't be this scheming villain plotting from her massive computer fortress. Not my Faye.

"I told you I'm not good at this kind of thing!" she retorts. "You know why I've always been alone? Because I don't know what I'm supposed to do!" She sniffles. "All I know is that I've wanted you in every way that's possible. It was a real accident that we met anonymously in #pokemecha at first, I swear. But you seemed so happy with your ideal of Eden... I couldn't risk ruining it. I was finally the one for you, even if it was through a lie!"

"But you already are! What do you think the past three days have meant to me?"

"Not as much as a week with Eden did!"

"Do you really believe that?"

"How can I not?"

"What's wrong with you?"

She gasps about the same time I do. I _really_ don't want to have said that. Her eyes, shining with newly-forming tears, suddenly narrow. "You are all alike. You're exactly like her!"

"Who?"

"Your sister."

"Wha--what's she got to do with this?"

"You don't know, do you? Your sister had a loving girlfriend whom she dumped when she joined the higher ranks of the Indigo League."

"I knew that. Just how did you find out? She changed her name in order to avoid that kind of publicity."

"Do you know who her girlfriend was? My older sister, Professor Audrey Holly. It's because of Audrey's broken heart that I vowed never to give into the vulnerability of love. Now look where it's gotten me. And with Lorelei's younger brother, at that."

"Faye, listen to yourself. You're inventing all these excuses..."

"Stop telling me how I think! You are as heartless as Lorelei, aren't you? Anything to make things go your way!"

"Leave her alone! _You're_ the one who pulled all the strings over the internet to make me fall for you!"

If she has a comeback ready, she fails to deliver. She stares at me for a couple of seconds before turning away, long hair swishing as she breaks into a run down the sidewalk.

The hidden paradise was in her soul all along, and only briefly did I find a way to the garden.

For the second time in two months, an obstacle keeps me from someone I love. Perhaps I am truly meant to be alone. 


	5. ch4p73r f1v3

Was it a surprise? I always envy those that can write a good plot twist.  
Oh, last chapter already. More like finally. I hadn't planned on five. I was hoping for three or four, so I don't drag out the angstandfluff. Not that I mind. More Shingo action.  
It amuses me to point out that Shingo/Faye and Lorelei/Audrey was a complete coincidence. I came up with Faye, appointed her as Shingo's girlfriend, THEN decided she was Audrey's sister. THEN, several months later, it hit me about the siblings. That'll be fun when Shingo and Lorelei bring their significant others home to meet the family. "Hey there, sister-in-law!" Hee hee.  
--Neekachu

**ch4p73r f1v3**

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Tracey asks.

I lean against the his door frame. "Why not? Maybe she can help, you know?" I stick my hands in my pockets. "And besides, I think I have something to tell her, too."

"I'll be here, if you want to stop by when you're done."

I nod and wave, heading downstairs and to one of the video phones against the wall. From my pocket I pull out the slip of paper on which Tracey has written a number, and I dial it slowly, hoping.

I am answered. And I am promptly freaked out as I stare into two round eyes and huge pink lips upon a dark face. "Jyyyyyynx?" she drawls.

"Ahh... hello," I say. "Is the professor there? I didn't know pokémon answered phones... wow."

I hear a woman's voice behind Jynx, who moves away from the screen. The owner of the human voice sits down primly and takes the phone, adjusting her glasses before looking up. "Hello there," she greets me. "You'll have to excuse Jynx. She does enjoy getting the phone for me. And the door, and the tea..."

"Um, hi," I say. "Look, this is kind of weird, and I doubt you know me. My name's Shingo. Shingo Primavera."

As I expected, she gives me a sharp look. Professor Holly knows very well that I'm Lorelei's brother. It shocks me how much she looks like Faye. The same thick, brown hair, only shorter, the same intelligent green eyes. She straightens up in her seat. "Yes, Shingo. How can I help you?"

"I'm sorry if I disturbed you. But I was wondering if you've heard from Faye."

"Faye? No, I haven't... is she all right?"

"I was hoping you could tell me. I haven't seen her since yesterday."

Professor Holly raises an eyebrow. "See... I don't know if she's told you about me or not," I say. "But regardless, we had a fight, and now she's gone into hiding. Neither Tracey nor I can find her."

I notice recognition when I mention Tracey's name. At least she knows I'm not some psycho. "So.. um..." I go on. "If she's called you or anything... I'm kind of worried."

"She hasn't, I'm sorry to say. She must just need some time to herself, that's all," she says. "It's sweet of you to worry, though. Faye probably isn't aware of that. She tends to underestimate people who care about her."

"You have to tell me what I can do," I say. "Or if I'm wrong for being so upset. She lied to me about something, yet I feel like I should apologize to her."

"She did, did she? And you're not mad about that?"

"I am, but... I think I understand why she did it. If it's true that she's never had a boyfriend before."

Professor Holly seems a little startled. "No, she hasn't."

"At least, not to your knowledge, huh?"

"No, it's not like that. Faye may come off as secretive, but that's only to those who haven't known her for her entire life. And of the few of those there are, I'm the only one who knows her true self."

"You're lucky, then," I mumble. "I guess she doesn't want me to know."

"It sounds to me like you really want to earn her trust." Professor Holly smiles.

_"It's because of Audrey's broken heart that I vowed never to give into the vulnerability of love."_ I remember what Faye said yesterday. Audrey and Lorelei... they'd broken up about nine years ago. Was that when Faye made her vow? Had she been steeling herself against her emotions for nine whole years?

Once again, she reminds me of myself. It was only three of those years ago that I decided I'd be a Scizor master, as hard and solid as the steel coat of Blade. I wouldn't need friends or love, just power and fame. Just like Lorelei.

Could I stand to let Faye slip through my fingers, just as Lorelei had so carelessly let Professor Holly go?

"Professor Holly?" I say then. "Um... about Lorelei..."

I'm not sure what kind of reaction to expect, and the professor surprises me by giving me a cold but curious look. "Yes?"

"I don't know the whole story, because I didn't even learn Lorelei's old girlfriend's name until yesterday, when Faye said so. But what I do know is that Lorelei does regret the past."

"So I've heard. Noelle met her, and she told me."

"Noelle?" These circular relationships boggle my mind again. Lorelei met Tracey's girlfriend? She hadn't told me.

Professor Holly nods. "But thank you for saying so. I suppose hearing it from Lorelei's own brother means a little more than whatever she told Noelle."

I wonder, and, in fact, I'm certain that Professor Holly knows about Tracey and me. I'm not about to bring it up, though. "Thanks for talking to me. About Faye. Hopefully I'll see her in class tomorrow."

"She should consider herself lucky, Shingo. Of the two of us, I'm glad she has someone who loves her. She deserves it."

"Professor?" I ask, but she only gives me a sad sort of smile and says goodbye. I stare at the blank screen for a minute before I hang up the phone and walk towards the elevator.

---

"Well, she did come to class," I say quietly to Tracey. For Monday's pokémon training session, everyone is lined up against the walls, because the first one-on-one evaluation battle starts today. Faye is leaning against the wall across from us, flipping through a notebook.

"Are you sure you don't want me to talk to her first?" Tracey offers.

"I don't know. We'll see, maybe she'll say something to me here." I reach to my back pocket, making sure the object I have is still inside, hoping Faye would accept a small token of peace.

Mr. Tajiri paces in the middle of the room. "I hope you're all ready for the most exciting class this school has to offer. Am I right? Let me hear you!" He's in rare form today.

"I swear he has to have met Professor Oak," Tracey says.

I snicker. "Put those two in a room together. You'd hear the crazed laughing for miles."

"Of course, I don't know how many battles we'll see today... you can't time those things," Mr. Tajiri goes on. "Neverless, I have made a list that pairs each of you off, judging by your experience and types of pokémon. So let's see what you're made of! Contender number one..." He raises a finger in the air, pausing for drama. "Mr. Primavera!"

"Oh," I whisper under my breath. For a fleeting moment, my old pride revisits me and I feel important again, just like at Muramasa's school. Tracey gives me a little shove so that I actually move to the center of the room.

Mr. Tajiri gives me a nod and smile. "Versus..." he says, picking up from where he left off. "Miss Holly!"

Everything seems silent and distant. I watch Faye close her notebook and set it aside, striding to the room's center, stopping on Mr. Tajiri's other side. I look over at Tracey, who appears surprised. It's not the fact that I must battle Faye, but her reaction to it all -- so very expressionless, so aloof.

"Uh," Mr. Tajiri mumbles, glancing at each of us. "Guess you're mentally preparing, eh? As soon as I'm clear, you may begin." He walks to the side, standing near Tracey.

Faye meets my eyes without saying a word. Meanwhile, a million words are mixing in my head. But this is class, and everyone is watching me, so I try to plead with my eyes while I walk backwards as she does, each of us taking our place. "It's been awhile since I've battled," Faye says coolly. "I kind of miss it, with school in the way."

"There are advantages to being in school, though," I tell her.

"Maybe." She enlarges a pokéball. "Go! Wartortle!"

My choice should be obvious. Tajiri and everyone wants to see Blade, but I know better than to be predictable. "Ledian!" I call, releasing it from its ball. Faye narrows her eyes. "Are you underestimating my Wartortle?"

"Are you underestimating my Ledian?" I counter.

"Hmph. Wartortle, bubble attack!"

Giant bubbles fly at Ledian, who avoids them by taking flight. "Supersonic!" I order. Everyone in the room covers their ears, and Wartortle stumbles about, slightly confused.

"Shake it off, Wartortle! Water gun!" Faye commands. Wartortle, who must be at a decent level, shakes its head and sprays a powerful blast at the airborne Ledian. Water splashes on me as well. Ledian crashes to the floor with soaked wings.

"That got it!" Faye shouts. "Now tackle!"

"Ledian, use light screen!" Its attack comes as Wartortle is mere inches away. The psychic projection of a blinding light stops Faye's pokémon in its tracks -- and upside down on its shell. "Use supersonic again!" I order.

Wartortle is a sharp one, though. It flips itself over using its tail, ignoring the supersonic completely, following up on its previous tackle attack without any prompt from Faye. Ledian is tackled and lands with a crumple several feet away.

_Defense versus offense,_ I think. I dare a glance at a wide-eyed Tracey, then back at Ledian, who struggles to rise as its wings buzz loudly, drying off. That tackle has done more damage than it seems.

"One more tackle ought to do it," Faye says. Wartortle charges.

_Stop!_ my mind cries. Her attacks on my pokémon feel like they're meant for me. I wipe aside a wet forelock. No, I can't let Ledian just take the abuse. I will go down fighting until the end. I will earn my battle scars. "Comet punch!" I command.

It seems that my passion is Ledian's passion as well. The attack is delivered at just the right time, again, a third time, and now Wartortle is thrown back several feet. Everyone holds their breath while it tries to get up.

I leave my place and cross the room until I am directly in front of Faye. "You're a good trainer," I say. "Wartortle is really strong."

"I know that! And it's not about to be knocked out by your first physical attack!"

"How could I let Ledian stand there and take the abuse?"

Faye narrows her eyes a little bit more.

"I don't know if it's me you're mad at, or yourself," I say. "I understand either one. If I said something Saturday, or didn't say anything ever... I will make it up in full. But I know I should have said, just before our battle..." I pause and reach into my back pocket. "It's time to duel." I hand her a card, a _Lu-Gi-Oh_ game card.

Our classmates whisper among themselves. I have no idea what Mr. Tajiri thinks of this once-top student, and I don't care. I'm watching Faye's reaction. She stares at the card, wordless, for what I hope is the right reason. Exactly like in the anime, it's called "Change of Heart."

"I love you, Faye," I tell her. "Please don't deny me that privilege."

She looks up slowly from the card to me. Before I can hope for the best, she flings her arms around me and cries unrestrained into my still-wet shirt. "I'm such an idiot," she says, muffled.

"No, you're not." I stroke her hair.

I hear a small noise at our feet. Ledian looks up at me, puzzled. Wartortle, too, has pushed itself upright and is staring at Faye.

"I think this match is officially a draw," Mr. Tajiri says awkwardly. "But, if I may be so bold, it looks like you both win."

"I'm sorry, great master," I say. "In a real match, personal issues shouldn't get in the way, but--"

"Now, now. This wasn't a real match, you know. What do you say, everyone? Isn't Mr. Primavera sweet, making a public apology? I think Miss Holly is a very lucky girl."

Several people go "awww," and it sounds like they really mean it. I laugh off my embarrassment, and so does Faye, still sniffling into my shirt. From across the room, Tracey grins at me. I squeeze Faye tightly, happy that I have truly won.

---

"In front of the whole class! I still can't get over it," Tracey remarks as the three of us return to Cascade Hall after dinner.

"You'd do the same thing, if you were there," I say.

"I don't know how Faye would react to my saying I love her." Tracey grins and turns his eyes away from the two of us, which includes an embarrassed Faye holding onto my hand.

"Oh, I see how it is, nature boy. Role-reversal, eh? Think I'll go draw some imaginative pictures of Noelle now."

"There's a difference between the imagination and a willing model, Shingo."

We all share a laugh on that one. Faye, who has been mostly quiet since the end of class, gives me a warm look. Everything will be okay from now on, I think. I feel a great sense of peace, walking along in between my best friend and my girlfriend, while the sun is out in clear skies for the first time in weeks. I feel as though I've won a great battle, although, in looking at the situation from a different part of my brain, it seems like nothing has really happened at all. It's similar to the situation two months ago with Tracey -- back then I felt like my entire world was falling apart, a feeling which only lasted a few days. Looking back on it now is like flipping through a book you've just finished; now that you've read the end and picked up the sequel, the conflict hardly seems like a conflict at all.

The clear sky is making me philosophical already. I should be a sage by the time it's actually spring. It's April in January, or maybe that's just the influence of Faye, my paradise on campus.

"I think my shirt is still a little wet," I tell Faye as she and I enter my room alone.

"But it must have been an hour since our battle. I'm sure it's dry now." She catches my suggestive smile only after she says that.

"As I was saying, I need to change," I say innocently. She giggles behind her hand as I deposit my perfectly not-damp t-shirt to the floor.

---

"You're right, I do have to be here in order to believe this," Tracey says. Faye and I have dragged him over to her room. He stands behind her desk chair, watching her computer screen over her shoulder. I have my laptop while sitting on her bed.

"Come on, Shingo, log in already," Faye says. "This is going to be hilarious."

***DigitalBlade enters #pokemecha**  
**Arca9:** whoa hey  
**DeepGreenEden:** Hello there, Master Blade. ^.^  
**DigitalBlade:** Why hello, my dear Eden. n_n

"Oh my lord," Tracey groans. "You're in a _chat room_ together while you're sitting five feet across from one another?"

"Shut up, nature boy. It's cute." I stick my tongue out at him.

"It's disgustingly techno geek cute," Faye adds. "Just like Shingo, huh?"

Tracey shakes his head in disbelief.

**Arca9:** what the hell is going on?  
**Arca9:** 3D3N j00 w3r3 601n6 4w4y  
**DeepGreenEden:** ph34r m41 r3turn1n6 5k1llz.  
**JigglyPuffly:** You guys HAVE to stop typing like that!  
***DigitalBlade pokes the puff.**  
**JigglyPuffly:** meep!  
***JigglyPuffly pokes DigitalBishie**  
**DeepGreenEden:** Hey, hands off. ^.^  
**DigitalBlade:** She's jealous.  
**Samuraichu:** Huh? I thought Eden was a guy.  
**DeepGreenEden:** I'm Eden 1/2.  
***DigitalBlade falls off the bed laughing.**  
***DeepGreenEden races to fallen Blade and tickles him.**  
***DigitalBlade ties Eden up and has his way with her.**

"Wow, so fast, Shingo," Faye says. "The Blade I used to know took about half an hour to even get that far."

"You know, I did bring a sketchbook, if you still want that commission," Tracey offers to me.

**Samuraichu:** Get a room, you two. ^^  
**JigglyPuffly:** Aww, they're so cute!  
***JigglyPuffly pounces Samuraichu**

Faye bursts out laughing. "Arca9's messaging me frantically. He says, 'Tell me what's going on right now! I'm so confused!'"

"Are you going to tell him that we go to the same school and are in the same dorm room at this very moment?" I ask.

"I do like messing with his brain," she gloats.

Tracey shakes his head good-naturedly, retrieves a sketchbook and pencil from his backpack, and sits down at the spare desk to draw. "Whatcha making?" I ask.

"I always wondered how to draw Faye tied up," he says, never taking his eyes from his paper.

"Hey!" Faye gives him a look over her shoulder.

"Cool!" I exclaim. "I'll give you some photos later for reference."

"Oh, no you don't!" Faye does race to me, tickling my sides relentlessly, which I'm sure Tracey is having fun really drawing. 


End file.
